JT and Janelle Gill have not always led worship from the stage of a Church. As they reflect on their growth in this area, it gives insight into how God is changing their story every time they worship Him.
Growing up in the Church, worship has always been a part of my life. From a young age, I was singing in children’s choir, and then later playing the piano for “Big Church.” But there’s a difference between doing something because it’s what you’ve always done, and doing it because it’s what you actually believe.
For a long time I had this crippling fear: will I ever really be able to help with corporate worship? I always felt disconnected with God when I led. I was self-conscious, insecure, believing that I really didn't have the gifts to help with worship. It’s what I loved to do, but what if I could never be a part of it?
When Janelle and I came to Harvest, it did not take long before we became involved with the worship team here, though this time there were two major differences: this was the first time we had led worship as a married couple, and at our own Church too! Even though we were, in a sense, doing what we had always done, I think both of us realized that something needed to be different this time, and God was faithful in that.
Harvest is the place where our faith has truly become our own, and continues to become our own the longer we are here. Every Sunday we lead I feel like I grow deeper in my relationship with Christ. I am challenged as to whether my worship on Sunday morning is an outpouring of what my life throughout the week has been, and if I can truly share the joy of that ever-deepening relationship with everyone else.
God has been working in my life over this year, and that work has had an impact on how I worship Him.
I never considered myself a worship leader before we came to Harvest. It’s a whole new experience and responsibility here. It’s intimidating and challenging when it’s your service to Christ and to the Church, but also so enriching. Worship to me now is this incredible give and take – I give Him my weakness, sins, and insecurities, and He fills me with praise for His strength, righteousness, and sufficiency! It’s a beautiful process that will stretch though my whole life. And it happens every day – not just on Sunday morning.
And that fear I’ve always had? I can’t remember the last time I thought of it! I remember the first few times we helped lead worship at Harvest, God gave me a smile that I couldn’t wipe off! Worship is a gift. It’s of Him, about Him, for Him and given by Him! We can never do it on our own and that’s what makes it so stunning. I never want to take worship for granted. He gives us Himself, always more. All praise to our great God!
I have a lot to learn, because this whole worship leader thing is so new to me. But God is continuing to change and shape how I think about it, and how I grow closer to Him through leading His people in worship!